Happiness: The Science behind Your Smile or HOW TO AVOID MAKING YOURSELF MISERABLE

“Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.”

                                                                                                                          ― Nathaniel Hawthorne

By Olena Denysyuk

INTRODUCTION

THE TITLE OF THIS BOOK IS “HAPPINESS: the science beyond your smile”.  IT SHOULD BE “HOW TO AVOID MAKING YOURSELF MISERABLE”. Happiness is a word that sells, but not the real topic of this book. It contents no concrete indication of what to do. Rather, it points where the main obstacles to a satisfactory life are. Actually this book is about what mistakes many people often make without realizing that their behavior will have almost inevitably lead to self-deception, disappointment and chronic frustration. And it shows that there can be many roadblocks on our ways to achieve our aims.

 

For instance:

-          our frame of reference, or how we compare ourselves to others with considerable myopia

-          the endowment effect, or how we come to attach more value than reasonable to our possessions

-          the peak-end effect or how we give preference to short-term intense enjoyment/entertainment over long-term pleasure

-          the exaggeration of the importance of life-events, i.e. the over-estimation of their effects on us personally

-          and, ultimately, the power of many foolish human desires, as it prevents us from enjoying our present possibilities for well-being, as Buddha demonstrated 26 centuries ago.

So, have you ever considered that actually we are not predisposed to be happy because we live on considerable state of uncertainty? For example, the knowledge of our own death, society’s suppression of our drives, or the cruel and illusory psychology of desire and “wrong” preferences, as well as other demands from society to be concerned with our self-presentation, put us in a state of eternal worry. 

Alas, we live in an economic system geared to constantly remaining us of our desires. So here we are leaving the personal sphere to the analysis of HOW our social organization based on market economics is inherently a source of profound frustration and the deep foundation of the lack of meaning in most people lives.

Therefore, we have to work hard to construct our own happiness.

 

Why is it So Difficult to Change a Habit?

Changing a habit is more about habitual behavior that requires a cognitive understanding of your activities. This means clear perception of causes and consequences of your own responses, reflecting on own behavior, and correct interpretation of a situation and a context according to what it means for you and how it fits into your reality. Changing a habit is more about knowing the psychology of habits.  

By Olena Denysyuk

OUR  bodies TENDS TO BE ENERGY-SAVING  and our brains give mostly a priority to what is perceived as usual, Therefore, very often,  we are not totally aware of our actions, as many of them are almost automatic. So, I will describe our CONSCIOUSNESS as “lazy”.

And there is a good reason for it: by performing complex behaviors without any consciousness, we save our brain energy for something more important. That is one of the reasons why our brain likes what is already familiar to us. Then, by knowing the patterns, our brains would know on which inputs to pay attention to and which to ignore. In music, for example, our brains crave familiarity, because familiarity is how we manage to hear without becoming distracted by sounds or noises. In turn, the system of liking makes us wanting it. Therefore, we are coming back again to something familiar to us, instead of wanting/accepting something new. And we come back- and we create habits. Again and again, because behavioral habits prevent us from becoming overwhelmed by the endless decisions we would otherwise have to make each day. That’s the rationale behind our lazy mind.

But at some point, for some individual reason, you might want to change a habit, as the brain’s dependence on automatic routines at some point can be dangerous. However, simply declaring your reasons for changing a habit (I am too fat, I am too lazy, I am too unhealthy, etc.) is not enough a predisposition for any work with a habit. The supremacy of the power of habits is thus in the understanding of the psychology of habits. So if you want to change a habit, you would need to comprehend the conditions (stimuli and clues) that lead you towards your habit. Also, you would need to understand what reward you achieve when executing your habit. Knowing exactly the powers of your habits, the dark as they are, is essential for forming and changing your habit behavior. Also, this way you can come to the source of “good” habits”. And, if you are lucky, you can adjust the dark power of a “bad” habit into something more enjoyable, powerful, and challenging.

How To Be More Creative?

Creativity is part of our mind, our meaning, and our personal dynamics. Creativity is what we need, if we are to flourish in our well- being, including physical, environmental, mental, emotional, spiritual and social health. It’s a way to find meaning in all what we do, how we live and where we go.         

By Olena Denysyuk

  I think it is a well-known statement that creativity combined with rationalization and reasoning, adds more value to everything. It is a way for a product to stand out in a crowded market. Be it design, a story, a play. Be it something that provokes feelings. Be it something unique and beautiful, but meaningful. And for creativity to give meaning, it should be enhanced by rationalization and reasoning. Does it give meaning? If not- it doesn’t matter- creativity doesn’t always make sense. But actually, how do you find logic in creativity?

For many years I crafted my logical and analytical abilities, the left side of the brain, but not the right one. But actually, as long as I progress these analytical (L-sided abilities), I am becoming better and better in my creative (R-sided) abilities as well. What are the reasons?

Can creativity be synthesized? Or explained logically, and can it be learned at all? Where do creative ideas come from? What I have noticed, is that my good ideas to my creative hobbies (design, photography) come when I am relaxed; when I am very much motivated; when I notice details and its “new connections”; when I push myself into creative thinking; and when I have a dream. But I am sure there is more to the story.

Historier om de psykologiske mekanismer, der styrer dit arbejdsliv (”Livsfarlig Ledelse” af Christian Ørsted) Del 2

”De historier vi fortæller om vores travle liv er afspejlet i vores virksomhedskultur. Derfor er det vigtigt, at vi hver især, individuelt, i vores teams, i vores virksomhed og som nation skaber andre historier, der kan supplere de gamle”, siger Christian Ørsted i sin ny bog ”Livsfarlig Ledelse”. Og ”de andre historier” skal, for eksempel, vise vej til bæredygtig ledelse.

Af Olena Denysyuk

Vi får ansvar og glæde, vi anerkender, at vi kan godt lide at have mange jern i ilden, for det betyder, at ens liv er fyldt op med vigtige ting. Vi elsker at fortælle, at vi er alt for travle.

Men kan det også være en årsag til psykiske lidelser, udbrændthed, stress, dødsfald.

Så hvordan kan vi ”skabe” en bæredygtig ledelseskultur ved hjælp af ”andre” nye historier, der supplerer de gamle, når vi ”ligefrem SKAL! brænde for vores job”?

Christian Ørsteds bog er et bud på ”de andre” historier, som kan være en årsag til livsfarlige ledelse, om dem, der er farlige for vores psykiske helbred.

Her er nogle af hans opmærksomhedsvækkende tanker, som vi alle sammen burde forstå essensen af.

Historie No. 1: Frideden er falsk

Strategisk ledelse eller mytteri? (”Livsfarlig Ledelse” af Christian Ørsted, Anmeldelse) Del1

Det er ikke længere godt nok, at være en STRATEGISK LEDER, som i det skjulte kan være utopisk. I dag skal ledelse være BÆREDYGTIG, fordi vores psykiske helbred er i ledernes hænder.

 

Af Olena Denysyuk

I den ideelle virksomhed vil jeg forvente, at strategisk ledelse styres på baggrund af STRATEGISKE mål, som en virksomhed forholder sig til, dvs. dens vision, mission, markeds situation, konkurrence, resurser. Traditionel eller hierarkisk, økonomisk, innovativ, kreativ ledelse er ”bare” en proces, der hjælper til at gennemføre målet. Men i sidste ende bliver ledelsesbeslutninger taget til gavn for  virksomhedens indtjening, med effektivisering i fokus.

 

Her kommer motivation, anerkendelse, personlig udvikling og teamwork ind i billedet. Det er de strategiske ledelsesværktøjer, der hjælper ledere og medarbejdere med at komme tættere til målet, eller overleve på den konkurrencemæssige slagmark, eller styre organisatoriske ændringer eller opnå fordele ved vidensdeling.  Derfor får vi også friheden til at udføre vores arbejde, fordi ”det rummer værdier, som ordentlighed, arbejdsmoral, socialt ansvar og effektivitet”, der også hjælper med at komme til målet.

 

Men noget kan gå helt galt: på tidspunkt brænder vi simpelthen ud, selvom vi bliver glade og tilfredse for vores arbejde. “Ofte brænder vi netop ud, når vi er mest tilfredse og føler os på sporet. Det er nemlig der, vi bliver dødmotiverede”, siger Christian Ørsted, som har arbejdet med coaching i 15 år. Og det er virkelig farligt for vores helbred, vores innovative kompetencer, vores familier og liv…

WHAT DOES CREATE TRENDS?:About the book by Malcom Gladwell, "The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make Big Difference "

Malcom Gladwell, "The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make Big Difference "


Sometimes small things can make big differences. All you have to do is find the hidden buttons to these small things, which actually have the power to act big. Let’s look at the case of epidemics, let’s find the hidden mechanisms that originate and sustain the trends and social epidemics.

By Olena Denysyuk

 I have often been asking myself, why do we love to follow trends, that, at first glance, we might not like? But which, we might like it later?

 

In this regard, I chose to read the book  by Malcom Gladwell, "The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make Big Difference ", a book  about what makes ideas infectious, what messages can spread the ideas, and how to start and sustain social epidemics and trends. It didn’t answer exactly my question.  

 

 

And when I read the book, I was thinking of giving it only 2 stars on Goodreads. But by reaching the end, anyway, it earned one extra star.   

With all respect to journalism, I was initially a little disappointed that a book about trends/epidemics (sociology, in broader terms) was written by a journalist. I might have been spoiled by the most intelligent book by Daniel Kahneman, "Thinking, Fast and Slow", as it was written by an expert. He managed to deliver his study of psychology and sociology not only reliably, but also amusingly. 

 

It's not that there is something wrong with Gladwell’s ideas and hypothesis, but I presume I am a bit critical towards his choice of arguments and research material-some of it seems weak to me, and he even sharpened some of it to fit into his own ideas. So I wonder why the book was so recommended by so many clever people.

 

 It's not that ORIGINAL, NEITHEIR ACADEMICALLY nor SCIENTIFICALLY. Here, the book had lost one star.

 

But soon after, I realized, it is rather good entertaining book - within the fields of marketing, but not human behavior or economics, as I originally thought it would be. And the book is even a bit thought-provoking and brain-teasing, I admit. The lost star found its way back!  

Freakonomics: A Rogue Economist Explores the Hidden Side of Everything (Review and Reflections) OR HOW TO THINK OUT OF THE BOX?

What caused the death of Nicolae Ceaușescu. Poverty? Dictatorship? Ignorance towards his people?  What do you think? A little hint: In 1966, one year after Ceaușescu had become the Communist dictator of Romania, he made abortion illegal in order to increase the population.

By Olena Denysyuk

The reform had an effect: within one year of abortion ban, the Romanian birth rate had doubled. The lives of these babies were miserable, being born by poor and young mothers, who would otherwise have chosen abortion. These babies were more likely to become criminals. On Christmas Day of 1989, Ceaușescu learned from his mistakes the hard way. With a bullet to the head. From the people of his nation, tired of living in poverty. People, who probably wouldn’t be born if not for the abortion ban- the ban that gave him a bullet to the head- NOT the poverty, NOT the ignorance. The brutal mistake of 1966, which he was not prepared for.

This is one of Freakonomics’ examples of novel thinking- by looking deeper, finding the root of the cause, rather than focusing on generally accepted truth. This is a case of how to think out of the box.

So what is Feakonomics about?

How the Economy Works (Review and a Summary of the Book by Farmer R.E.A “How the Economy Works: Confidence, Crashes and Self-Fulfilling Prophecies”)

After studying economics for many years, I still ask myself a question- why do we need to make profits and create growth in order to generate a good life? Sure, it creates more jobs, increase competitiveness, stimulate start-ups, and revolutionize products. But is that the only way economy works? This brings me to the next question: what is the real core of economics? Is it housing, finance, consumption, import, investments, finance, production? Had we known the answer, we could well have fixed economy problems without creating new problems.

  

Historically, economists strived to describe how economy works, by applying logical reasoning, simplified modeling, statistical and mathematical modeling. Technogical progress within computing greatly favored this development.

For example, In 1949, Bill Phillips (William Phillips), the father of the well-known Phillips curve, created The MONIAC (Monetary National Income Analogue Computer) also known as the Phillips Hydraulic Computer, a device that gave a ‘feel’ for economic behavior, by presenting visual (rather than numerical) results, which were accessible without prior knowledge of explicit advanced mathematics.(on the picture). 

In 1969, the first Nobel Prize within economics was awarded, thus consolidating economy as a science equal to chemistry, physics and mathematics.  However, the praise the economists received often got dwarfed decades later, as fellow peers rejected the validity of these same models and “old” economic thoughts” were abandoned.  

New understandings were formed, which influenced the politicians’ decisions

Economics is a mechanism, which cannot be defined by any model, graph or definition. However, understanding of economics is still crucial for our survival. It’s a mechanism, driven by our needs, desires, interactions, perceptions and emotions. From another side, the economy makes the final decision what life we should live. Paradoxically, the economy outcomes depend upon the actions of everyone in society, and the same time, economy dictates our actions. So, as peoples’ behavior cannot be predicted, and understood properly, neither can economics behavior.

  

"Thinking, fast and slow"

My class mates used to tell me that the reason I got high grades in oral exams was because of my confident argumentation. I used to believe it was true. However, it was schooling, it was easy to make assumptions, to prove a theory, or apply a specific formula, and consequently, sound certain.

However, recently I have noticed that unfortunately, in some situations I was misguided by my own perceptions of reality, my own argumentations, or even my own knowledge on a particular subject. Especially now, after being employed for one of the biggest Danish companies, I have completely changed my perception of certainty, after having experienced “real-world” uncertainty.  Because of business complexity, my own intuitive and not-intuitive perceptions can be misguiding. Not that my understanding or solution to a given problem are wrong, but as the world becomes more complex and information more limited, my own decisions become more biased, and arguments less powerful.